The reason men look at porn is because they are trying to find validation (Do I have what it takes? Am I a MAN?) and take it to the woman. The problem is that women aren't meant to validate us in that way; our fathers were. Eldredge says this: "Why is pornography the number one snare for men? He longs for the beauty, but without his fierce and passionate heart he cannot find her or win her or keep her. Though he is powerfully drawn to the woman, he does not know how to fight for her or even that he is to fight for her. Rather, he finds her mostly a mystery that he knows he cannot solve and so at a soul level he keeps his distance. And privately, secretly, he turns to the imitation. What makes pornography so addictive is that more than anything else in a lost man's life, it makes him FEEL like a man without ever requiring a thing of him. The less a guy feels like a man in the presence of a real woman, the more vulnerable he is to porn."
One reason why a lot of men look at porn is because we don't have a good understanding of what beauty is and God's purpose for the beauty that women are meant to unveil.
I recommend that you read John Eldredge's books "Wild at Heart"
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